Sunday, September 5, 2010

Running doesn't bring safety.

Not even a month ago I was having extreme pain and itching on my forearms and neck. It would shatter my sleep with the sensation of white hot icepicks being driven into my flesh and nothing would cause it to relent. The itching and the pain correlated and scratching made both worse, and yet, I could. not. avoid. itching. After a short while of this, I would begin cursing and my attitude would turn bitter and resentful. A little research finally led me to the only thing that helped and that was an ice pack to deaden my nerves and help me fitfully return to sleep.

In these times, the thought passed through my mind to sell my soul to get rid of the agony (not that I have that option since God, you know, sort of owns my soul). Still, it was humiliating for me and a great cause of sorrow on my part that something so basic as an itch could bring me to my wits ends and fray my nerves so completely. The faith I spent so much time cultivating was broken quickly and the only thing holding me together was God's faithfulness.

I was reminded of Job from the Bible when he was afflicted with sores from the top of his head to the soles of his feet. His only recourse from the agony was to use a broken piece of pottery to scrape away fluids from the leaking pustules covering him. Yet, His hope in deliverance from God remained firm. He knew God to be His ultimate and only source of healing.

While I was meditating on the shallowness of my faith and lack of endurance, the thought of soldiers in trenches during World War I entered my mind. They lived with the rats and roaches, often with trench foot so bad the skin on their feet would slough off in great chunks. They were gassed and lived in full facial masks that made it almost impossible to exert oneself and breath at the same time. Enemy shelling would drive them deep underground for days at a time to the point that many soldiers would become "shell shocked" and lose control over their bodies and psyches.

What was the average soldier's response to this intense suffering? Did he leave the utter lack of comfort in the trenches for safety above ground? Did he remove his mask when he could barely breath to inhale the air outside? God no! Those soldiers knew that, though they suffered mightily in the inhumanity of the trenches, the danger out of the trenches and in the foul air was far greater. Certain death lurked in those dark shadows. Though they lived worse than brute beasts they accepted, even fatalistically, the life of suffering they were called to be in. There was no choice in the matter if they wanted to live. Their safety did not resolve around seeking comfort but in enduring a life of suffering for the promise of peace that was to come.

This was true for Job just as it is true for me and you. No one can avoid the pain in this life by running away from God who heals our pain. We are trapped in dying bodies that will suffer and die through all the pangs of that death. We are surrounded by a world that in its very nature seeks to destroy us and bring about a victory for wickedness. We are attacked on every side by demonic minions and our own convicting thoughts. In all this do we then turn to the world for solutions that it inherently cannot provide? Can the world kill us and also bring us to life? Is it wise to avoid God who is the wellspring of life? Not if you're being honest with yourself.

Our safety revolves around the only One who was able to enter into the enemy's trenches and silence their guns. He endured our agony to save us. That One is Jesus and only through trusting in Him alone are we able to come back into the light of day where the air is clean and the sun is bright. In Him alone are we able to remove the stifling masks that hid our faces for so long. It was for freedom that He set us free and only in Jesus can we live a life befitting the only creature to be made in God's image. Do not give up on God's healing for such light and transient causes of this world that is passing away. In just a little while we will finish the race of faith and enter into the heavenly courts where Jesus will look upon us face-to-face and His father will say, "Well done good and faithful servant."

1 comment:

  1. Wow... your writing is amazing, Evan. You are such an inspiration!

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