Refined thoughts on abortion.

Bringing life into the world is meant to be a thing of dignity. In light of this, the crux of my anti-abortion argument becomes a moral one. Advocates of abortion often use it as a means to perpetuate immoral lifestyles (whether they admit it or not). After all, why would a woman have responsible sex when all she has to do is terminate her pregnancy any time she gets pregnant? Why would a man consider sex an honorable thing if he never has to wrestle with the natural consequence of bearing children?

If you want bad behavior just subsidize it. We can deduce that an abortion subsidy (or payment) is immoral simply because of the result it brings about (more abortions and less responsibility). How can abortion ever be naturally good if the result of it is more immoral behavior and an unwillingness to accept the consequences of one's own actions?

If we were truly concerned about being dignified human beings we would accept the results of both the actions we choose and those we do not. For instance, if a woman is raped she can make the decision not to punish the baby resulting from her rape by aborting it. It is not the baby's fault, after all. It is a tough decision, to be sure, but it gives great value not only to the life of the unborn but to the giver of that life (the mother).

I say this to reveal in depth the motivation for the beliefs I hold. I belong to a way of life that is advocated by an innocent man who was willingly murdered in order to free me from the guilt of my own dishonor. He chose to give me dignity through His sacrifice though I did not deserve it. In this, His love towards me was even more amazing than the mother's love for a baby she chose to carry to term in spite of being raped. In my example, the baby did nothing wrong yet was saved. According to the innocent man, I was His murderer and yet He bestowed upon me (a guilty man) the same gift of life the mother bestowed upon her unborn child (an innocent). Thus, my argument is centered not necessarily in outlawing abortion, but specifically in revealing to the heart of man a dignifying love that is offered to all. That love is given through Jesus, the Son of God. His goodness is the true motivation for righteous living and in such living there is no need for abortion.

Joy in dark places.

It was the burden of death delayed. It was a new beginning waiting just beyond reach of that eternal door. With its approach was a weary sorrow.

Looking back, this is what I sensed when I visited a convalescent home years and years ago. I was a confusing mash of emotions trying to avoid suffocation under an intense weight of hopelessness. It was one of the most dreadful places I have ever been to. Walking down the hallway, I peered into a multitude of rooms open to all observers. In them, elderly people had their diapers changed, drugs administered, meals delivered. Every event was a spectacle and it sucked up joy like a sponge.

Well do I remember the lack of life before my eyes as I entered the "living" room. It felt like residents had gone there to die. Almost every seat was filled with the breathing dead. The TV was on with its volume turned low so that every hushed word crashed around the silent room in deafening waves. Heads rolled to the side, eyes were glazed over and spittle flecked the shirts of those whose mouths lay open.

My mind's eye recalls it as a sea of gray. Yet, there was a bright spot that drew my eye immediately. It was a brilliant purple splotch on the gun metal canvas. As it turned out, the name of the splotch was Lois. She was bedecked with a beautiful, old style purple skirt and vest. Her shoes matched and were in prime condition. Even her hair was done up and on it sat a purple hat, suspended at a rakish angle on her silvery curls. She had not succumbed within those haggard walls!

It took some time for me to make it to where she sat though she was not my destination. First, the woman closest to the entryway slowly looked up at me and a flicker of life flashed across her face. To this day I forget her name, so I will have to make do with remembering the brightness that sprang into her eyes. I sat with her for a few minutes, made jokes and complimented her on her charming good looks. We laughed and the room began to stir. More heads came up and a particularly mindless individual began to babble at me and laugh quickly. His mind stayed lost, though his eyes were anchored to my face. I was being called to leave but felt that I had a great opportunity to inject hope into these lives.

I pardoned myself from the first lady and approached Lois who had beckoned to me. I sat with her for a couple of joyful minutes while stating that her purple dress really brought out her beautiful eyes. Her laughter shimmered. Sadly, it was time for me to excuse myself for good. Lois made me promise to return and as I left I wished God's blessings upon everyone in the room. All had awoken by this time and the TV no longer smothered their dreams.

Sadly, I made an abrupt departure and am not particularly happy to remember it. Much to my shame, though I could see the need for Jesus and His love in that place, I never returned. I never saw Lois again. I broke my word to her. The situation was simply too overwhelming for me having never experienced such a thing before. Also, my personal visions of grandeur were at odds with the extreme limitations before me. Still, no excuse is worthy to be made.

Having thought about this much over the years, I have come to some difficult, yet good conclusions. The goal, as Shane Claiborne states in his book Irresistable Revolution, "was not to keep people alive, but to allow people to die with dignity, with someone loving them, singing, laughing, so they were not alone." But what dignity could I have given just by myself? For that, Mother Theresa said, "We can do no great things, just small things with great love. It is not how much you do, but how much love you put into doing it."

Even Jesus said that what we have done for the least of people we have done for Him. Learn from my (forgiven) failings. Love God in the small moments of everyday. Love His children and meet them at the point of their need. Bring them dignity with your love. We are an army of Davids and our small, tender works combined will change the world for Jesus. We are the light of Christ, called to bring His brilliance to a darkened world!

Love and sacrifice.

^{Hebrews 12:2-3}
Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Hebrews 13:15-16
Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise—the fruit of lips that confess his name. And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.

For the past couple months, I've been mulling over some things that happened during Christmas. I was given a deeper understanding Jesus' life while with my grandparents in Colorado. My grandpa is in his 90's and really falling apart. He's had a couple of bad falls (are there any good ones?) and his shoulder was the size of a grapefruit. His back and chest were hurting in a number of places, too. I found all this out within minutes of my arrival and my mom immediately gave me the opportunity (voluntold me) to rub pain numbing cream on his torso. Helping my grandpa in this way was definitely out of my comfort zone especially after a six-hour drive. Still, I made a joke with him that I would be willing to wash his feet also if he asked. When I said that, I was struck with the thought that, for the most part, true love does not simply encompass romance or constitute a feeling. Love is a means by which we often sacrifice our own comfort and standing in order to do what is best for others.

It wasn't my desire to rub ointment on my grandfather but when I saw the thankfulness in his eyes and accepted his profuse thanks my heart changed. God gave me a better understanding of what Christ did for all of His children. I had met his need and that was of great importance. This, in turn, helped me to appreciate all that my own mom had done for her parents. She was getting pretty worn out from spending so much time taking care of them. It was a little difficult because, in part, they realized the burden my mom and her other siblings were bearing and seemed of the mind, at times, that it might just be best to move on from this life. I'm not sure how much conviction lied behind my grandparents' words when they were briefly mentioned, but I knew that my mom needed encouragement to continue blessing her parents.

I was able to pull my mom aside one day and let her know that all she was doing was worth it. In her loving service, she was giving dignity and honor to her parents in a way that she herself had received from them when she was just a child unable to care for herself. She was also teaching her parents, who were no longer self-sufficient, that there is great honor in accepting unconditional love when it is offered. My grandparent's acceptance of my mom's free love offering returned dignity to her because, though giving a gift is wonderful, a person must still receive it with a full heart for it to have its complete value. She met their needs and comforted them and, in return, everyone was able to see the love of Jesus as though He were receiving our suffering and giving us His love at that very moment.